Tuesday, January 27, 2009

The Proper "Weigh" Revisted

Two years ago, I posted this blog on Boomer Babes and can you believe it...the ten pounds finally came off? So now I don't have to go to such great "lengths" to make myself believe that I actually weigh less than I actually "was" (are you confused yet?). Read on...

If you don't want to do it the hard way (eat less and exercise more), just get yourself a Kymaro body shaper (they work...you automatically look 10-20 pounds thinner). Although once you're in, you're not getting out (trust me!). You will be permanently "iglooed" into that thing. I almost called 911 to help me wiggle out until my hubby arrived on the scene and rescued me (not once, but twice!). I must say the proper "weigh" is so much easier!

Here's a stroll down memory lane...

“I can’t believe I was doing it wrong all these years. We MUST get the word out!”

My precious mom sent me this e-mail last week; I fell off my chair laughing! Only because I am THAT woman! For years, I have been tricking myself into believing that I’m the proper weight. And—now—I want to share with you a little “secret”!

First of all, I do weigh myself (regularly!), once a month in Towson, MD (are you listening, Dotsie?). I go to the GNC store (lower level of the Towson Mall), tastefully peel off all the layers of clothing (to what is legally allowed!), put 50 cents into that silly weight machine, and enter my height: 5 feet 11 inches!

“Fibber.”

Truth be told, I’m exactly 5 feet 3-3/4 inches. Here’s my “secret”: If you put in a “taller” height, you get a reading like this: “You are 35 pounds underweight for your height. Here are some tips to help you gain weight.” (Oh, such glorious words!)

I dance out of the store, waving my tiny receipt in the air, and shout, “Yeah, I need to gain weight!” Shoppers scoot out of my way as I gallop upstairs to Starbucks and order my double mocha cappuccino.

Deception?

Yes. I’m really 10 pounds overweight. The same 10 pounds I gain and lose in five-year cycles. And the same—seemingly endless—vanity pounds that keep disappearing and reappearing. So what’s the point?

This is January (right?) . . . and next month is February (I think!). So between now and chocolate season (my heart’s desire), I need to lose 10 pounds (only because I have my cholesterol checked on February 14—heart day!). If that’s not an incentive, I don’t know what is?

Here’s the serious part (you knew I’d get to it!): I’m a survivor (as in cancer). So why should I care about my cholesterol, my weight, and taking care of myself? Because now I have so much more to live for. I got a taste of life ten years ago—while facing my own mortality (if that isn’t an oxymoron?)—and I LOVE LIFE! I think that’s the proper “weigh” to live.

LIVE WELL.

LOVE MUCH.

LAUGH OFTEN.

And pleeeeease throw out the BATHROOM scales!

“A merry heart does good, like medicine . . . ” (The Bible!).


Living Life Passionately and a "little" Lighter,


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